Realization
by SuperWhoLockStuck64
Summary: Through trial and error the trolls are trying to fit into the kids' world now. John is insistant that he is "not a homosexual" but could that be subject to change? After a few months of living with Karkat things start to get a little confusing for John and a lot of feelings are clouding his thoughts. There will be smut. Oh trust me there will. Rated M for a reason my dears(;
1. Chapter 1

"JOHN _GODDAMN_ EGBERT, YOU GET THIS _STUPID_ THINK PAN COVER OFF OF ME THIS INSTANT. IT IS TOO EARLY FOR YOUR TOMFOOLERY!" Karkat raged as he struggled with the knit beanie that had now managed to wrap itself around his horns. "Pfft, sorry Kar but you have to wear that if you're planning on going to school with us!" _Damnit_. He hadn't thought of that, turns out most humans were uncomfortable with the thought of a horned troll going to the same learning facilities as them, or really being anywhere in there general vicinity. "Urgh, fine. But get this stupid piece of shit off my horns." John strode over giggling and with a slight tug managed to get the beanie off and back on in a comfortable position. "There, good as new!" he smiled. John gave him a quick up-down to make sure nothing was out of order. When he found out Karkat wanted to attend his school he made sure to have Dave spread a rumor the new kid was a kind of albino. He knew if Dave said it everyone would believe it even though Kar had colored hair, but maybe the light grey tint of his skin would be enough to convince them to so they wouldn't ask too many questions. "What the fuck are you staring at you douche bag?" Karkat demanded with a quizzical tone. Snapping out of his thoughts, John hastily replied "Oh! Nothing sorry Karkat, you just, well you look really nice actually."

He could feel the stupid red blush creep on his face, turning quickly he blurt out "Psh, you humans have a shitty taste of fashion, Kanaya would flip her shit if she saw this abomination you call a 'nice outfit.'" John just laughed. He knew better than to expect a thank you or any other kind of polite response to a compliment from Karkat, especially this early in the morning.

You had to be in your classroom by 8 o'clock and from the distance John's apartment was it took about an hour to get there. Not at all convenient but they were a lot more flexible than previous schools he had attended with his absences, and with a plethora of trolls new to the environment expecting you to get them adjusted flexibility was your best friend. "Okay," he took a deep breath, "do you have your book bag?"

"Yeah of course, isn't that a staple if you're going to a shitty human school?"

"Snack?"

"Why the actual fuck, John, would I need a snack? In the eight hours we are at this hellhole do they not feed us some assortment of retched collations?"

"Well yeah, but you might get hungry before then, and you're less cranky when you aren't hungry!" John retorted laughing. Karkat was not going to argue with him on this, "No, I didn't think of a snack to pack." Rubbing his forehead, he tried to think of something he could take. "Don't worry about it Karkat, I figured this would happen so I made you a snack pack!" He sounded overly eager, almost glad that Karkat had forgotten a snack to take. Thrusting out his hand, expecting to feel a bag of carrots or some other human finger food be placed inside, he was surprised to feel John's hand slide into his. Faking protest, he allowed himself to be pulled to the kitchen where John had discreetly hidden a medium sized lunch box inside the fridge. Whipping it out with great enthusiasm, John placed it on the counter unzipping it to reveal the contents.

"I packed you some of the chocolate covered pretzels you said you liked, baby carrots, a peanut butter and jelly sandwich (with the crust cut off just how you like), a granola bar, and some faygo!" John's smile was giddier than a schoolgirl's who had just been asked to the celebratory dance humans call 'prom' by the boy she flushed for. Karkat couldn't believe the amount of thought he'd put into this, so he didn't mention how much he hated faygo. "Wow, uhm, thanks John. That's actually... really sweet of you." Karkat hadn't noticed the subtle blush that had taken to his cheeks, but John did. He loved when Karkat let his guard down and showed his kind side. Beneath all the cursing and foul names, he was actually a really sweet guy. John loved the way he ogled at the treats; it gave him a lot of pride that Karkat Vantas had approved of it. Snickering he broke the silence, "Okay we better get going or we'll be late!"


	2. Chapter 2

The drive seemed shorter than usual with someone to talk to, well it wasn't really conversations they were having, more of John talking about Nic Cage and Karkat grumbling about how it was too damn early and that the Board of Education were slave drivers for attempting this kind of shit. His hands were sweaty but cold, and his heart was beating excessively fast for comfort. A lot of really horrible shit could happen if people found out he was a troll, they weren't like John and the others, they didn't know. _Oh Gog, I swear if I somehow manage to fuck this up… _Karkat thought remorsefully.

Pulling up to the school John was a tad anxious to see Karkat's reaction, would he be excited? Nope. A look of almost terror had fallen on the poor guys face, John watched him take a big gulp, cough and sputter, "It's... It's not that bad, not as uh, shitty as I thought it was going to be." John could see faces lining the windows facing the parking lot. _Dear lord here we go. Dave probably dramatized this whole thing and now it's going to be 3x harder trying to get through this day_ John thought remorsefully. Getting out of the car, he opened Karkat's door and tried to mentally prepare himself for the day ahead. "You know they're going to ask you about your eyes and stuff?" John hesitantly asked. "Shit." What would he say? What had John and Dave already told everyone? "Dave and I told everyone you were a type of Albino!" John stated as if he'd read his thoughts. "Fucking albino? John I don't know if you've noticed but I am the fucking opposite of albino. Do I look colorless to you? Compared to an albino I'm a god damn artist's palette!"

"No they all believe it! Dave told them it was a really rare case of albino and, uh, that it had different effects on the body!" How John managed to make it sound like it was all okay Karkat would never know, but one question remained on his mind, "Is something wrong with their think-pans? Like honestly John Egbert, how could they be so dull?"

John just smiled, he knew Karkat was worried something would go wrong but he and Dave had pretty much thought of everything. They made the lie about being albino, told everyone not to touch Karkat too much especially his hair saying how he was overly sensitive, and even said the medicine he takes makes him moody and to not take to heart what he may say. Now that Kar knew about the lies, he could go along with them if someone brought it up. "Just trust me okay? Dave and I, we got it under control here." John said with a wink. They were at the door, no going back now seeing as how they had a fucking crowd built up. Karkat took one overly shaky breath and walked into the school after John.


	3. Chapter 3

"Ooh, John! Who's yrou friend? *your" Roxy slurred at him almost immediately. She always came to school slightly trashed and it never ceased to baffle him how she managed to get away with it time and time again. He could smell the booze on her and one glance at Karkat showed he could too.

Karkat had already made a promise to himself that he would try not to be an asshole to these people so as not to embarrass John. Already this was proving a tough challenge. This trashy blonde was hanging on John looking right at him, she reeked of alcohol and was slurring. He didn't like the way her eyes traveled from his face downward and it made him even more uncomfortable where they rested.

"Uh, Roxy this is Karkat! Karkat, this is Roxy." John was uneasy about this. Karkat had never been one to sugar coat things or put up with behavior like Roxy's'. Things got worse as Roxy detached herself from him and strutted over to Kar, draping herself around him.

"Well hello there, Karkab!" She said breathing heavily into his face. 1,2,3,4 this was a trick John had taught him just count to ten, 5,6,7,8 ,9, 10.

"Hello Roxy, it's uh, nice to meet you. By the way it's Karkat." He said it in an awkward way, half because he was feigning politeness and half because he really wanted to scream at this drunk bitch.

John's mouth hung wide open. Literally hung wide open, he could tell Karkat was actually really trying to be nice so to honor his valiant efforts he swooped in to save him. "Well Roxy we really better get going, lots to do and show!" He said with a fake, overly cheery smile. Without noticing, a small crowd of girls had formed around them. They had come first out of curiosity, then out of desire to talk to the little troll. John couldn't really blame them; Karkat was quite the sight for sore eyes. _What am I thinking? I am not a homosexual_.

"Hey there cutie, why don't you let me show you around?" one girl catcalls.

"Ooh, I'll come too we can all talk about how interesting it must be to be an albino!"

_Is this bitch serious? I'm not even a real albino and I want to rip my hair out_.

"Oh wow, are those colored contacts?"

"No stupid, remember what Dave said?" she started to whisper, "It's because of his _disorder!"_

Yeah, so that was definitely their cue to leave, John grabbed Karkat by the shoulders and steered him through an opening in the girls.

"My god do they always do that to new people? Are they so bulge hungry that they attack any new prey that happens to stroll into their environment?" John snickered at his comment.

Nudging Karkat with his elbow he praised, "Good job with Roxy, I thought you were really going to tear her a new one, but you held it together really well!"

"Yeah well trust me; it wasn't as easy as it may have sounded." Karkat retorted, a slight shudder taking him from the thought of her 'hug'.

It was like a constant battle trying to keep people away, they were always reaching out trying to grab Karkat's arm. Once they even tried to snatch his beanie, luckily John was fast and stopped that train in its tracks. They had gotten to the school a bit earlier than expected and had extra time much to their dismay. Roaming the halls proved to not be an option so John suggested they head to the first hour class. A proposition Karkat was more than pleased to agree to.

"Remind me again why I was so fixated on coming to this place?" he grumbled as they walked into the class. To make matters worse there were assigned seats so instead of sitting next to John he had to sit in the very back with some particularly sketchy looking kids. Cursing his luck, he rested his head on his hand and counted to ten.

A hoarse whisper came from his left, "Hey, hey freak!" His skin prickled at the boys' choice of words. He turned his head to look, the boy had short blonde hair and an eyebrow piercing, his face was square and his nose had a bump of cartilage right in the middle. He looked greasy and had a slight outbreak of acne on his chin and forehead, his eyes were red where they should have been white making his grey-blue irises looked fogged over.

"Can I help you?" Karkat said through gritted teeth, still trying his hardest to be polite despite this asshole's harassing.

"Who the fuck has red eyes? Like really what are you some kind of vampire wannabe? Go back to fucking Transylvania you freak." this comment made the boys around him chuckle. Karkat chose to go back to his original position and count to ten; actually let's make that twenty, Karkat chose to count to twenty because at this point he was going to need twice the time to calm down.

"Hey fuckface I ain't done talking to you, turn your ass around. What? Scared you'll knock off your faggy ass beanie?" The boys around him were practically in hysterics now. Karkat never did understand why the use of homosexuality in teasing was so funny, or why it was so looked down upon, it was a normal occurrence in troll society and even in the human species. Then again, the humans proved repeatedly they had a screw loose in the damn think-pan so Karkat chose to just stop thinking about it.

Rough hands gripped his shoulders, squeezing tight through the knit material, his chair was pulled out from under him, but that didn't really matter seeing as how he had been slammed into the wall. Karkat was under a barrage of hands, some trying to hurt him, others trying to help but still doing more damage than anything. Voices, high and frantic, merged in confusion and frustration. He wasn't really worried about any of that, his primary concern was keeping that godforsaken beanie on his head and praying no one would try to rip it off.

He could tell by the way the teacher moved about the boys this was probably a regular occurrence, but it still didn't ease his nerves. He couldn't fight back; he'd sworn he would behave. He was helpless against this brute and that pissed him off more than anything else. As they ripped the thug off him he felt a hot sting slide across his abdomen, that fuck had a small knife hidden in his sleeve!

_Well fuck him and all his ancestors before him. I hope his goddamn lucus is proud of this because the level of fuckery has reach anew and I cannot even begin to comprehend. No fuck him I will not go to the nurse I would rather ride hoof beasts with that fuck Equius than admit defeat to this ass_. His thoughts were like fuel to the fire.

"Mr. Vantas are you alright? You seem to be bleeding?" The teacher asks obviously concerned.

"I'm fine." a curt reply is about as polite as it is going to get. Hands are still placed on his shoulders, soft hands, light and feathery, light as air; it's John. When did he get there? He didn't seem hurt, but he was slightly out of breath.

"I'll take him to the nurse's office sir." The tone John used was uncharacteristic of him, sensing this the teacher did not protest and neither did Karkat. He hadn't known how much he'd been shaking until he felt John pull him all the way up; gasps filled the room as the entire class noticed the cut the thug had made. It burned but he refused to show any signs of pain, as he passed he heard a cluster of girls talk about how manly and strong he was.

_Gog, this was a terrible fucking idea._ He felt Johns hand slide from his arm down to his own hand, grasping it tightly. The cut was really starting to hurt now, most likely because of how fast they were walking, "John I really don't want to go to a nurse, I-" Within a flash John had yanked them into some room. There was cleaning supplies lying around and an array of other miscellaneous items.

"Why the fuck are we in this shit shack?" Karkat exclaimed before looking to the other boy. His head was hung low and now he was the one shaking. Karkat knew he was crying before the first sniffling sob broke out.

"Ah, John! Don't cry, look this…room isn't so bad I guess…" Of course, he would get it wrong. This almost made John laugh.

"No it's not the room!" he managed to say.

"Well then what's wrong?" _Well that's a stupid question, obviously if it's not the room it's the fact you just got jumped by some greaseball_.

"I couldn't help you!" John murmured as he sunk to the ground. "That asshole attacked you and I couldn't get him off before he carved you like a pumpkin."

This made Karkat snicker, "If you think this little thing is 'carved like a pumpkin' remind me to keep you away from Kanaya." John still whimpered. Scratching the back of his head, Karkat did the only thing he really knew how to do when someone was emotionally freaking out. Sitting down in front of John, carefully though so as not to aggravate the cut, he leisurely reached out his hand and placed it on Johns head. He began to pet John's hair and gradually added his other hand lightly patting his cheek.

"Karkat what are you-"

"Shoosh."

"Karka-"

"Shoo-oo-oosh!"

A hot blush crept across Johns cheeks and he was thankful the room was dim so the troll could not see. Karkat was looking directly at him with a soft look on his face as he continued to pet John's hair.

"Better?" Karkat asked a little concerned.

"Yeah, I guess so," John noticed that they still had done nothing about the cut, "Oh shit, I think I have some band-aids in my locker!"

"Nah," Karkat replied passively, "Just leave it. I've had worse." This made John feel a twinge of the same sadness he'd just gotten semi over.

"Well we at least need to do something about your sweater, it's ripped now." Looking down he realized, yes, the sweater was indeed ripped right across the middle.

"Ah, shit. I didn't think to pack anything else!" Karkat moaned.

"Here," John retorted as he took off his sweater, "Just wear this."

He handed it over to Karkat who set it down. "Well aren't you going to put it on?" John asked quizzically. In response to that, Karkat ripped the remaining parts of the sweater.

"What are you doing?" John shouted, surprised by the sudden removal of the garment. "I don't want to get blood all over your sweater; I'm making a makeshift wrap."

With that, Karkat wrapped a thin piece of the sweater over the wound, which was much deeper than he'd expected, and secured it with the sleeves he'd torn off and tied together. John watched this in awe; his friend really did have an amazing physique, and pain tolerance. Wiping the excess blood off his belly and hands, Karkat slid the light blue sweater over his head and gingerly into its place.

Sky Blue turned out to be a very cute color for him, John noted seeing the way it made Karkat's eyes shine even more vibrant.

"Hello, John? John Egbert are you with us?" Karkat was waving a hand in front of his face.

"Oh, sorry Kar, guess I blanked out."

"Yeah I noticed, let's go I heard someone passing say the bell was about to ring, isn't that a code to all of you that it's time to move to the _next_ fun filled class?"

The last part was dripping with sarcasm; after checking to make sure no one was watching they popped out of the room, which was ironically enough a janitors closet, and headed towards their lockers. The next few classes Karkat had alone; out of the four of them in only one did he sit near the front. He'd noticed a pattern, teachers usually put the misfit douche bags in the back and clustered the normal kids toward the front, every time they set him in the back they promised to make room closer up. He could only pray they were serious.

John was anxious for every class period, constantly worrying about if people were still picking on his friend. He hadn't realized that he and Dave had four whole classes straight that they did not share with Karkat.

"Dude, calm down. The little guy is tougher than you think, gotta be with all the shit he spurs."

Dave lucidly remarked as he sketched yet another idea for his comic blog, SBAHJ.

"Yeah but what if it's not like… You know physical attacks, what if they're being mean to him?" John pondered.

"Yo. He'll be fine. No one's going to pick on the kid. Jeez, did you see how he raked in the bitches this morning? Kid will be fine."

Seriously, are there honestly no other seats besides the ones in the back? Are the teachers just endlessly fucking with him? The past two classes had been nothing but being punched in the back, verbally harassed, and poked with cork pins. _Who just carries around a cork pin though? Like how honestly fucked up do you have to be to get out of bed and think, hmm I'm going to jab some poor bastard in the back with a fucking cork pin. BECAUSE THAT'S __**NORMAL**__._

He was counting to one hundred now; his senses were on overdrive trying to predict when the next strife was going to occur. Fortunately, there were only 10 minutes left to this class and then it was lunch. He'd already gone through the carrots and pretzels and was left with only the peanut butter and jelly, granola bar, and faygo. Ignoring whatever trash they were tossing at him he thought about the snack pack John had made him. He was most excited for the sandwich. It had been handmade and even had the crust cut off, it may have seemed like a little gesture of kindness to some, but to him it was a big deal. No one ever did things like that for him and even though he was a jerk most of the time, he made sure to show how much he appreciated it.

His phone vibrated, back here the teacher would have no way of seeing if he checked it, and the idiots around him had taken a short intermission on making his life a living hell. Oh great it was from Vriska:

"_Just it would 8e nice to tell you, if you fuck _

_ this up and start some sort of crazy anarchy_

_ 8ecause they found out that you are in fact_

_ a troll it's all your fault(:"_

There seem to be people everywhere, Karkat can feel his heart beating, thudding against his chest in some mad and despite attempt to break free. They have their eyes glued to him, analyzing every nook and cranny of him, they're learning his secret and they don't intend on keeping it. Of course he'd fuck it up; he was the grand master at fucking it up. Fucking things up was his specialty, his talent. The bell rings and a flurry of colors fly past him each ready for lunch, the kids behind him don't waste a free opportunity to hit him off guard.

The teacher foolishly leaves the room and wanders into the hallway, and that's when they attack. One hits him above the right eye, another in the collarbone; he's so tired he doesn't even try to tense up he just lets it happen. He won't fight back and risk embarrassing John or even that fuckass Dave. Another blow to the cheek this time on the left side, he feels heat poor down his face and he cranes his head forward saving the sweater from any overly crimson drops. He's on the floor now, sighing heavily as they leave, the last one kicking him in the stomach for good measure. That's the one that hurts the most; his vision is clouded by stars and colors, his face feels like pins and needles. As he waits for it to pass he hears the teacher come back, but this is ever so faintly as the ringing in his head rather drowns everything out.

Clarity finally comes like a god sent angel and he scoops everything up and dashes out the door, somehow tissues were stuck in his nose and he was actually somewhat grateful for that. Making a mad dash for the restroom, he turned the corner hard and knocked right into someone.

"Oh my Gog are you seri…" He began until he realized who it was.

Dave Strider stared down at him , rubbing the spot Karkat's head had hit on his chest. "Hey little man," shock took over his face, "Holy shit bro, what the hell happened to you half-pint?" He sounded generally concerned but Karkat hated all the damn short jokes.

"Nothing, just some ignoramuses in my classes." he tried to turn his head in a way that Dave could not see the growing bruises or bloody tissues hanging out his nose, but it was to no avail. Dave delicately took Karkat's face in his hands and examined him thoroughly.

"John is seriously going to shit bricks yo." He said nonchalantly. Sliding his arm across Karkat's shoulders, Dave steered him to the sinks. "C'mon, let's clean you up some." This was the nicest Dave had ever been to Karkat and it made him a bit apprehensive.

"Why don't you just fight back? I know you have it in you, you could hand their asses to them on a frying pan if you wanted." Dave interrupted.

Karkat just sighed, "I promised I would _behave_."


	4. Chapter 4

**a/n:**

**Sorry guys, this chapter was kind of rushed so if there are any mistakes kindly forgive me!(: Have some Dave/Karkat bonding moments though! ;D**

* * *

Dave just nodded as if it was a reasonable enough reason and wrung out the brown tissues he'd been wetting. The kids face was already turning a mix of ruby and dark grey from the bruising he had. Dave looked at the dried blood on the bottom of Karkat's chin and winced a bit, but not enough to really show any emotion. How the guy managed to keep the sweater clean he couldn't comprehend.

Speaking of the sweater, this was not Karkat's normal black and grey turtleneck. This was John's hoodie. Why was Karkat in John's clothes?

"So what did you do to piss everyone off?" Dave asked offhandedly while he wiped the squirming troll's face off.

"Apparently breathing is enough to piss off these idiotic fuckasses."

Dave paused briefly to look at him; he could tell the kid was hiding something. He wanted to know why exactly they jumped Karkat so soon. He figured eventually they would want to mess around with him, maybe knock his books out of his arms or trip him in the hall. He never expected them to blatantly beat the shit out of the guy. He felt pretty much like shit now considering he was the one who stopped John from checking up on Karkat during class. That probably would have saved him a beating or two, but there was no way to change what had happened; the best he could do was clean him up.

"My eyes."

The words came out of nowhere; barely a whisper and Dave almost thought he didn't hear it.

"What?" He asked, trying to be sure what he heard was accurate.

"My eyes. They attacked me because of the color of my eyes." Karkat was looking downward. A slight shiver took hold of his body hardly noticeable if the watching person would have been anyone else besides Dave.

A cold feeling sunk in Dave's stomach. No one but his close friends knew that he had red eyes and he'd always intended to keep it that way, now he had a real reason too. Is that really the reason they harassed Karkat so ferociously?

Shame. That was the feeling coursing through Karkats' veins at the current moment in time. He'd always been self conscious of the way he looked and the color of his blood. He was a freak by troll standards and an even bigger freak by human. He didn't want to go through the rest of the day, knowing that they were watching him, examining every little detail that differed from their own definitions of normal. He also didn't want to give the shitsacks the satisfaction of knowing they'd put him in a state of dismay. He was unbelievably embarrassed at the hot prickling that was building in is eyes that would top it all off, cry like a grub in front of Dave fucking Strider.

Karkat felt arms wrap around him, awkwardly at first, but then with more confidence as they secured him close to the body they belonged to. Dave had him in a gentle, but firm, embrace and Karkat was not sure why the fuck he did. He was surprisingly greatful for it though.

"Seriously bro, fuck them. Fuck them with the plethora of freakish Smuppets Bro keeps at home; Smuppets with spikes and shitty sword accessories." The words he spoke were nonsensical but his told was cold; serious.

Even though Karkat could tell Dave was trying to be reassuring and somber, he couldn't help but giggle some at the (slightly disgusting) mental image that brought. He rested his head on Dave's chest and took a steadying breath. He was going to get through this day, and all the day's after it, he was going to show John it was a good idea to bring him.

Dave felt Karkat pull away from the hug, so he released his arms. Expecting to see a pissed off expression or hear a wave of swearing, he was more than a little shocked at the sight that presented its self. Karkat was looking up at him, a wide grin gleaming on his face. It was most likely the cutest thing he had ever seen and he could definitely see why the bitches flocked.

A silence went between them, Karkat had decided that he was in fact going to finish this year at the godforsaken shit hole and everyone else was just going to have to deal with it. He pondered maybe asking Rose if she could conjure up a spell that would make his horns temporarily disappear, that would make things a hell of a lot easier; He hated that damn beanie. He heard Dave cough, dragging him out of his thoughts.

"C'mon fuckass, let's see what shitty compilation your human food maids have designed for us to force down in some shit poor excuse for nutrition." Karkat joked, still smiling.

Laughing Dave countered, "Bro, you don't have to tell me twice."

They walked out of the restroom together, after making sure nobody had watched the little scenario that unfolded itself moments ago, and walked down to the lunch room. While listening to Dave rap, showing off his sick beats as he put it, Karkat couldn't help but notice the large group of girls that had begun to form around the lunch doors.

"Oh shit bro, looks like all the bitches lined up to greet you." Dave nudged Karkat with his shoulder; pulling his shades down just low enough Karkat could witness the sarcastic wink.

Chuckling, Karkat playfully shoved him; maybe this kid wasn't such a douche after all? He could definitely see why John still hung out around him at least. This matter aside, he could still see the growing problem this was going to cause, if he didn't manage to find a way around all these bulge hungry nook suckers. An image of his beanie being ripped off his scalp like a rocket propelled spaz maggot spring-loaded up the ass of a psychedelic fucking freak out weasel on idiot drugs flashed through his mind, this caused a slight bought of gooseflesh to crawl its way up his arms.

"You okay dude? Got a mad case of goose bumps going on?" Dave noted looking down at Karkat's exposed arms.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. Just the thought of those nook sucking, frothing, Looney block assholes down there just, augh!"

Rolling down the sleeves of John's sweater, he shook out his arms in an attempt to shake away the minuscule bumps. There had to be a way around them, looking to his left he only saw a long hallway leading to the other classes. Hoping there would be more opportunity on his right he swiveled his head. There was no such thing. Opportunity did not present its ugly head and the only way he was going to get through was to go through those girls. This was going to fondle major seedflap and he just knew it.


	5. Chapter 5

A**/n: another rushed chapter, i've been having to do these first hour at school. hopefully they're still good(:**

* * *

As he and Dave grew closer to the pack of girls he could hear their excited whispers, things like taking him to prom and parties drifted back and forth among them. In front of him was the dumbest bunch of festering discharge that dared label themselves 'human' and he had to act like true gentletroll. At further inspection he could see that alcoholic, what was her name, Roxy? She was in front of them all, sizing him up the same way she had this morning. Those hazed lustful eyes made Karkat sick and all he wanted to do was run the fuck away from her like someone with a ripperwasp in his jock.

"Hai Karkab!" Roxy yelled out, unnecessarily drawing out the greeting. Dave stifled a laugh and shoved Karkat in front of him. Give him a hidden glare Karkat replied to the girl.

"Hi, Roxy." He tried to be polite but damn this bitch was making it hard. He already hated her. He hated her and all these other fuckasses so much for making such a damn spectacle of everything; so much so he felt he could possibly even hate a hole in paradox space itself, straight through to a new reality, fresh for the hating.

"Why don you come ate with us? *eat." She slurred in, Karkat assumed was supposed to be, a seductive tone. The thing that annoyed him most was she was so drunk, she realized she was drunk and knew she had to correct herself. What the actual fuck makes a person want to drink so much they learn to do that?

John had been scanning the lunch room for any sign of Karkat when he noticed the large group of girls that had begun to form themselves around the entry way he figured that'd be the best place to analyze. Upon seeing Dave doubled over in laughter he knew that's where Karkat was and he was more than a little scared at what was happening. Karkat may have been doing a marvelous job in keeping his cool, but with all that had happened John wasn't sure how long his friend would be able to keep it up.

"Why didn't you kick Erik's ass?" One girl shouted.

"Please, come sit with us!" Another yelled.

"Dave? Dave! You mind helping me here?" a frantic whisper John recognized. Doing a wonderful double facepalm John exhaled heavily and pushed his way through the crowd. The girls practically had a fit as the three boys began running away to their own table half of them screaming because of the joy it brought to see all three linking arms, the other because they were pissed.

"SWEET ALMIGHTY TAINTCHAFING FUCK! This place is full of fucking psycho's!" In the back of the lunchroom Karkat could drop his polite act and let his real emotions run rampant. Dave was still laughing pretty hard and it was not pleasing the troll one bit.

"Dude, dude, I'm sorry but **really! **Your face bro, priceless!" Dave managed to get this one garbled sentence out before bursting into hysterics. Karkat's eyes narrowed.

"Oh, oh Dave! Do you hear that? My chute is now doing a fucking stellar impression of someone that does not give a shit about how hilarious my facial expressions at the time were! Those lunatics could have devoured me there on the spot!"

He lightly, well lightly for Kar, punched Dave on the arm sending the blonde boy back into his fit of giggles. John couldn't help but laugh too, it was as if things were back to the way they should and none of this thug nonsense ever happened.


	6. Chapter 6

**The bell rang before i could really finish this chapter, sorry ! haha, I'll work on the rest of it next hour!(:**

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The rest of the day went pretty well for all of them; Dave and John were on a fierce lookout for anyone else that would give Karkat trouble. The teachers were pitiful on him and did not assign any homework he rest of the day, an occurrence that, not only the three boys but, the whole school body was thankful for. Karkat was absolutely exhausted by the end of it, dragging his feet as he made his way to John's car.

"That was the **most** crotch blistering thing I have ever had to endure." He groaned, sinking into the plush seats.

The car seemed like the throne of a king to his worn and beaten body. Relaxing into the cushions he rested his head on the cool window pane. He felt hot and uncomfortable; the window was like a blow of bliss across his forehead. John was going on about something, he wasn't really listening, probably something about Nic Cage like on the way here. He noticed his head beginning to droop and gladly gave way to the drowsiness he felt, falling into a much needed sleep.

"Karkat, I was really worried about you today! From now on don't feel like you have to behave or anything okay?" John thought about that a moment and rephrased, "Well actually, _behave,_ unless someone like Erik tries to hurt you again, okay?"

Waiting for a response but getting none, John turned to see Karkat fast asleep. He looked so peaceful; a smile played across the young trolls face as he dreamed causing John to take a slight flush.

_He looks precious.. Gah! What am I even saying, I am not a homosexual and that is a pretty homosexual thing to think. He would be weirded out if he ever knew I thought that!_

The slight hint of pink that had once painted John's cheeks now turned into a full-fledged blush, his entire face was bright red. He knew there was nothing wrong with being homosexual, especially in the troll society, but he'd always been with girls. That meant he couldn't have feelings like this for guys right? _Right_? He knew Dave had been with both genders and that it was pretty normal for him, so maybe it was okay for him to feel this way? He was so very confused about his emotions, and too embarrassed to ask anyone about it. The whole ride home he reflected on this, being tortured by the inner conflict. Could he possibly have feelings for Karkat? Or was it just a very close friendship? He didn't know and couldn't tell for sure, he'd never felt this way before and the mass of emotions was foreign to him.

He hadn't realized how long he'd been lost in thought until he pulled into his own driveway. He was totally clueless as to how he managed to drive all the way there, having no memory of it. Getting out of the car he silently prayed he didn't run someone over or drive through any stoplights. John went to Karkat's side of the car and opened the door. He tried fruitlessly to wake the boy up only getting groans of protests and breathy sighs. Scratching the back of his head in hesitation he decided the only way to get him out of the car was to carry him. It wasn't uncommon for Karkat to fall asleep in the car, and John had carried him out of it before, but with all the thoughts he'd had on the way here it now seemed wrong for John to do it.

Nonetheless Karkat had to get out of the car somehow and seeing as how he wasn't rousing from his slumber carrying him was the only option. John exhaled and reached across Karkat to unbuckle the seat belt. He was in such a close vicinity of Karkat he could hear his soft, steady breath. It was so calming, looking up into Karkat's face he could see all the worry wiped from his face, just a look of serene calm.

Wrapping his arms around Karkat and pulling him from the car, he made his way into the apartment.


	7. Chapter 7

Karkat in arms, still sound asleep, John trudged up the stairs. Karkat hated elevators and even though he was asleep Jon didn't want to risk ruining this moment. Also, the thought of sharing a small space with a stranger, while holding a troll boy just wasn't all that appealing. Their room wasn't too far up anyhow, and with Kar being exceptionally light, John didn't really mind.

He felt something tickle his neck, softly snickering he glanced down. Karkat had nuzzled his head near the crook of John's neck, his breath fanning rails on the sensitive skin. Finally at their room, John stood blushing furiously by the door, as the skin of his neck was continuously washed with Kar's soft sighs. Shifting his weight to one side, choosing rather to focus his attention on opening the door than the thoughts swimming in his head, he inserted the key. Easing his way into the room, careful being sure not to bump anything on the door frame, he used a soft gust of wind to discreetly shut the door behind him.

Karkat was mumbling something in his sleep, John strained his ears trying to make out what was being said, but to no avail.

_This is so wrong, this is __**so**__ wrong. I shouldn't feel this way about one of my bro's!_

His mind was frantically trying to convince him to just put Karkat down and that be the end of it, but something inside him just couldn't, didn't want to really. So instead, John advanced to his own bedroom, the door already open and the curtains making the inside dim. It was the end of winter and the day faded to night much earlier, leaving it looking much later than was true. John didn't mind this at all, almost as if in a trance he set Karkat down on his bed, which had already had the covers pulled back conveniently enough. A slight jolt ran through him when Karkat's arms flew out, wrapping themselves around his neck. He must have thought he was falling, John seized the opportunity. Shaking, he laid himself next to the other boy; so close that their foreheads were only an inch, two at the most, apart. John's heavy, nervous breath contradicted Karkat's tranquility, and with every movement John worried about waking him.

God, this was so nice. This was the most amazing feeling, albeit most nerve wracking, he'd ever experienced. Pulling the covers over the two of them John tenderly laid one arm under the pillow both their heads rested on, and the other even more delicately around Karkat's waist. The warmth that filled the bed was practically heaven, as it creeped up from John's toes to his head, throwing him deeper into these confusing feelings. Muddling John's thoughts to a further extent Karkat, with his arms still wrapped around John's neck, pulled himself closer to the blue eyed boy, totally unaware of the stimulation he was causing. A sharp gasp escaped John's lips as Karkat nuzzled into his chest, closing his eyes trying to calm down, he willed his heart to stop beating so furiously lest it wake the other boy.

The day, the emotions, and this secret…whatever he was doing had all made him so tired. John tightened his grip around the slightly shorter troll, melting at his touch, reveling in the moment. He knew Karkat would wake up and all hell would break loose, but for right now, he just wanted to imagine that every night could end like this.


	8. Chapter 8

**sorry if there's typos i had to hurry! I'M SO SORRY FOR BEING SUCH A HORRID UPDATER. I'LL FIX IT I SWEAR!**

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Late into the night, 11pm to be exact, Karkat awoke to a sight that damn near made him flip his shit. Wrapped around him, John slept peacefully totally unaware that anything was happening, Karkat's heart beat fast; what did this mean and how the sweet fuck did this happen? Of course he was over joyed, he had been flushed for this little fuck for god knows how long, but with all of his talk about "not being a homosexual" he never believed his feelings were reciprocated. He'd watched enough RomCom's in his day to know that this could lead nowhere PG, he smiled nervously not really knowing where to go from here, should he wake John up? The human was so close, his heat had been keeping Karkat warm all night apparently, it was glorious, even though the covers had been kicked off sometime in the night he was snug in the other boys' arms.

He was hesitant in his movements untwining his arms from around John's neck reaching a, shaking, hand out he gentle rubbed the others arm.

"John?"

His voice cracked from the previous grogginess of just waking and the anxiousness that had taken hold of him. John did not respond, still fast asleep, so Karkat tried again praying his voice would not betray him.

"Hey, John? Get up."

Bright blue eyes fluttered open out of their bleariness, Karkat watched as John slowly put together the situation. He felt a tremor travel through John's body; his cheeks dusted a dark red that Karkat could vaguely make out despite the darkness.

_"Fuck, he's cute for a human…What the hell am I talking about? He's cute period, human or troll this little nooksucker is precious." _

Wincing at the unmanly thought he distracted himself by teasing John, "So," he paused smirking, "Not a homosexual, huh?"

"Karkat!"

John was on the verge of tears, and his voice reflected that. Karkat didn't mean to make him so upset, shit he figured that John would be more resilient seeing as how he made the first move. Sighing aloud Karkat pulled the boy closer to him, wiping the tears away before they could fall, gazing into John's eyes. He swallowed hard, still nervous himself in spite of the collected persona he was playing.

John was still shaking, a slight yelp came from him when Karkat had pulled them closer, his mind was fuddled, shouldn't Karkat be mad at him?

"I'm sorry, I-"

He was going to apologize for this whole mess, but was interrupted when Karkat leaned in, kissing underneath this left eye, then his right, and finally leaving a soft peck on his lips. With each surprisingly tender kiss John felt more secure in the fact maybe Karkat wanted this as much as he did. John's eyes fluttered as he processed this bit of information. His mouth moved to say something, yet nothing came out, and instead of using words he used his body to convey the emotions he felt. A trembling hand tangled itself in Karkats hair, while the other grabbed hold of the trolls shirt, pulling him back into another kiss.

John's lips were soft, softer than anything Karkat had ever felt before; he never wanted them to move away from his own. He lowered John on the bed, making trails with his fingers up and down the boy's neck. Karkat wanted to explore every part of him, he wanted to become familiar with the different anatomy, Karkat wanted more than anything to become so familiar with every part of John that it was almost like they were one being.


	9. Chapter 9

**sorry for the cliffhangers, its hard to write smut at school ;.; hahaha!**

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But sweet shit John was good in bed; he'd worked his hands up from in Karkats hair to wrapping loosely around his horns. John began massaging them with his thumbs in long lazy circles that made the troll shiver with delight. A cross between a whine and a moan rumbles through his throat and Karkat tried, desperately, to stifle them but to no avail. By now Johns lips had left his, kissing along his cheek then down his jaw and on to his neck. With every exhale the boy made he blew hot breath across Karkats skin, leaving goose bumps crawling over his body. Once at the junction of shoulder and neck John worked his way back up, mumbling things Karkat couldn't hear through all the desire.

"W-what?" Karkat managed to choke out between heavy breaths.

John's face turned an even darker shade of red, much to Karkats pleasure, as he averted his eyes and repeated himself, "I-I said," He paused, getting quieter, "I think I might be…_slightly_ homosexual…" John buried his face in Karkats shoulder, the heat from his flushed skin making it harder for receiving boy to concentrate.

"Good."


	10. Author note

**Gah, I've taken a lot of time...an insane amount of time...off from this fic ;.; Sorry about that! Expect updates on it within the next few days though3**


	11. Chapter 11

**There might be some errors this was a quick right between study sessions for exams . **

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This was all Karkat said before leaning down to place tender kisses upon his lover, looking up with eyes filled with awe at the whole situation he smiled softly. He noticed there were the beginning of anxious tears forming in Johns eyes.

_"Makes since, he's probably…confused."_

Still wearing the uncharacteristic smile, Karkat touched his and John's foreheads together, rubbing the skin of the boy's cheek with the pad of his thumb.

"It's okay," his whispers softly, his normally aggressive tone softened to a warmer tone, more kind, "It's okay to be confused and scared, I'll…I'll go slow."

He placed soft kisses all over John's cheeks, not stopping until a small comforted smile spread on the human boys cheeks and Karkat knew he'd be okay. A grey thumb wiped away oddly clear tears, something he still didn't understand but because it was john though was beautiful.

He kissed along John's jaw line, warm, slightly rough , lips worked their way to the boy's ear enjoying every moan and whimper the touch brought. His tongue traced the shell of the other's ear, slipping up and dragging back down to nip gently with slightly dull teeth; now thankful for the nubbiness. Something was going on with his shirt, confused he popped one eye open to glance and be slightly surprised. John was responsible for this hesitant pull, not wanting his lover to lose his nerve the troll practically tore off his shirt; his eagerness making John laugh in an embarrassingly adorable way, a way that Karkat needed to hear more. He wanted to grace his ears with all of John's sounds. All of them, from laughs to moans and even cries. Anything that the human could give him he wanted, he didn't care if that was greedy, for once he was okay with a flaw of his own. Greediness for the other was a flaw he was actually proud to have.

John quickly took advantage of the freshly exposed skin, grazing his lips over the bare shoulders, hands snaking down from Karkat's horns to rub his sides, curiously massaging the grubscars, eliciting a moan from the troll. Encouraged on, Karkat now reciprocating by petting his hair and holding him closer John tested more, pressing into the scares with a more firm touch and switching to a light bite on the other's shoulders.

"Gah..ff..f-fuck John..harder.."


	12. The actual chpt 11

He wasn't expecting such a request, which in hindsight was probably a silly thing to not expect Karkat was a rough troll it's only natural he'd want a rough touch. Either way he complied biting down hard, he was a bit hesitant to do such a thing not exactly eager to hurt the other but the moan that follows is enough to keep him going. Karkat whines and dips his hips down _certain_ that he wouldn't be able to keep up the soft touches much longer, but when John bites down it's like a little slice of heaven and that seemingly permanently etched on scowl turns into something so blissful it would almost be comical.

They touched and shivered turning more into a mass of heated gasps and tangled limbs, rocking the bed with each movement of body. Each face flushed, John's pale skin nearly tattooed with the bright red blush up to the tips of his ears as Karkat slowly shifted his pants down in a left-right-left-right fashion; claws ghosting over his skin so delicately it would've tickled had he not been so worked up. The tent in his boxers was prominent, this fact not helping the red hue no not one bit in fact his body managed to pull of the almost impossible feat of darkening, intriguing the troll. He inspected the rise, trailing his fingers over it like a child experimenting with textures, his face beaming when he received a good reaction, usually in the form of sucked in breaths or strangled moans. John tried to shift, discreetly reveal how uncomfortable he was with the investigation, but Karkat would have none of that; he simply held the boys hips in place, making a pout that, albeit groaning in complaint, made John still.

Curiosity was a wonderful thing, and it managed to push the troll further, finding new confidence in his actions as he dipped his fingers under the material. John lurched forward, eyes wide, chewing his bottom lip as though the more he worked it the less anxious he would be.

"Y-You too!"

"John, full sentences please I'm not fucking Vriska I can't just delve into your fucking think pan and know exactly what you mean."

Karkat rolled his eyes, a coy grin playing on his lips as he began to relax not much minding the alien bulge, but eager to see how it looked. John gulped audibly, shifting a bit as he reached a shy hand out to tug at the Cancer's pants this eliciting a very exciting moan. The boy made his best pout, eyes sparkling in the dark room catching every ray of light there was only to reflect back in a sea baby blue.

"I won't be the only one stripped down."


End file.
